Friday 28 April 2017

6 NEW BANDS: Nikos Mixas' 666 Pack Review for April 2017


The 666 Pack Review

 

It’s the April edition of The Sludgelord’s 666 Pack Review and the Easter Bunny is drunk and horny for fresh blood.  Just kidding, just seeing if you actually read anything other than the reviews.  If you’re new to this, each and every month we handpick 6 review submissions and critique them by only using 6 words, then we rate them on a scale from 1 to 666!  Check out our awesome rating scale below: 


1 – Worse than a eating a handful of Peeps covered in shit.      
2 – Kim Jong-Un would consider this excellent music, um…we don’t. 
3 – You’re average, kind of like Swiss cheese...
4 – You just earned yourself a basket full of jelly beans.  Mmmmm….jelly beans…
5 – Better than the new Deep Purple or Krokus albums, that’s for sure. 
666 – The Easter Bunny got so high off your metal that he challenged The Sludgelord to a fight!!! 


April means the first quarter of the year is almost finished and there’s only a couple of more months until the metal festival season kicks off.  Keep them chops up and send in those demos!  The Sludgelord is a picky listener…and doesn’t care what you think of his opinions….




1). March The Desert - “Tidal Mind” – Reading/Brighton, UK    Rating: 1


This band doesn’t deserve six words…

 




2). Black Tundra - “Black Tundra”Warsaw, Poland   Rating: 3

Heavy Pelican worship, good, not original.





3). Sparrowmilk - “Articles of Separation”Cleveland, Ohio   Rating: 666!

This is how you instrumental son!






4). Polemos - “As Within, So Beyond”Calgary, Alberta   Rating: 2
 

Black metal mixed with punk vocals?

 




5). Rope Trick - “Red Tape” Providence, Rhode Island   Rating: 3


Very raw, garage band fuzz worship.






6). Shadowake - EP” – Canada   Rating: 1


Zzzzzz….zzzzzz……zzzzz….zzzzz…..snort…zzzzzzzzzzzzzz……….